how do you explain it to them?????

What I've found out in my 5 years of bliss is that's it's a very serious give and take between the two of you. My wife is good about not getting mad about the things I buy, as long as they serve a good purpose. Here's a good example. I bought the front end loader to help move dirt, rocks and firewood. Which makes life easier for both of us. I have not bought the .44 mag pistol with a red dot scope I'd like to have for deer season as this only helps me. Both are toys, but one has benefits for both of us.

Regards, RAB

A friend of mine told me marriage is like a three ring circus.
1ST comes the engagement ring.
2ND comes the wedding ring.
3RD comes the suffer ring.

Damn thats funny every time I here it.:-)

Maybe like some of the guys said, if she is like that now (?) who knows. I say let her in on the decisions but make sure she understands your not just blowing money

Can't help ya with the woman. Gotta figure that one out yourself.
However, I'm willing to bet that if you wait until the second Saturday in April, you'll find all that stuff you were looking at and more at an auction, and will probably sell for about 1/2 what he was asking... Just watch the Herald to confirm the date.....

Rod

How is it that you two have been married for six months and she didn't even know how much you make??? No wonder she's scared.

You need to open up with her, talk about things you both want, decide how much each of you can spend on toys, savings, etc. She should have as much input into a decision to buy something as you do.

At the risk of sounding "preachey", here's my opinion. Marriage is a 0% / 0% proposition. Each partner in a marriage has to be willing to give up everything for the benefit of the other partner. I dedicated myself to my wife when I proposed marriage to her 43 years ago. She is the most important person in my life. There is nothing that I wouldn't give, give-up, quit, start, or continue for her. Guess what. She feels and does the same for me.

If I were you, I'd sell anything that irritates her. I'd quit doing anything she doesn't want me to do. I'd elevate her to a pedestal and continually show my love for her. You will find a fulfilling, gratifying life of giving and receiving if you'll determine to forget yourself and live for her. In no time at all, she'll feel the same way about you.

Good luck,

Tom in TN

But.....

Be cautious, I was married to a woman I did this to, the way ours turned out was she got everything she wanted, I gave up doing and having everything she didn't like, she was on a pedestal, I might as well have lived in the septic tank, as my life was crap.

I divorced her after finding out she cheated on me a second time ( that I know of ), I had warned her after the first time I will forgive you once, don't do it again as I won't tolerate it twice.

So....before you put your faith and love and start sacrificing yourself and putting women on pedestals....be damn sure they are worth it and will treat you the same in return.

Marriage is an institution... and who wants to be in an institution????

Best advice I can give you is to keep your balls between your legs, not in her pocket. If you give them up now you have a long road ahead of you.

One piece of advice I'll offer, the "Married Man's Maxim"

"It is easier to get forgivness then permission."

Buy your gear and things will sort themselves out.

-Dog's Friend

It took quite a bit of talk to get to buying a nearly new tractor a year ago but we are both happy about it now. She was very upset at first but we talked about what it would be good for, I'd spend less time fixing the old one, it was easier for her to drive etc.

She's not as keen as me on the haying but does pitch in and enjoys the work and being outside.

I think as long as she sees it as a hobby and you explain that you aren't going to sneak purchases by her until you're bankrupt it should be ok.