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AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

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dave2

04-18-2008 03:57:02




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1. If you're choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.


2. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.


3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.


4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.


5. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.


6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you'll be afraid to cough.


7. You need only two tools in life - WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.


8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.


Daily Thought:
SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES -- NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING, BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS




And last: If you can't fix it with a hammer, yo u've got an electrical problem.

Have a good weekend.

Dave

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Old Roy agiin

04-18-2008 21:10:23




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 Re: AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES in reply to dave2, 04-18-2008 03:57:02  
The one about the toilet seat??--My wife kept yelling at me for letting it up until one day she said with a very stern voice EVERY TIME I GO IN THERE THE SEATS ALWAYS UP!!! I said[EVERY TIME I GO IN THERE IT'S ALWAYS DOWN]--Now we compromise.no more arguments.I just make sure when I leave I put it back down.HA!HA!



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JoeBob/IN

04-18-2008 19:36:09




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 Re: AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES in reply to dave2, 04-18-2008 03:57:02  
I have to ammend the :And last: If you can't fix it with a hammer, yo u've got an electrical problem.

First step is get a bigger hammer! Then if it doesn't work get the blue wrench then on to the electrical problem!



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Nancy Howell

04-18-2008 09:00:38




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 Re: AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES in reply to dave2, 04-18-2008 03:57:02  
We've had a real idiot marking up the walls in the stairwells (some call it graffitti, I have other terms). I sent the slinky one to our police chief.



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Aaron Ford

04-18-2008 07:47:47




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 Re: AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES in reply to dave2, 04-18-2008 03:57:02  
Thanks, that one is a keeper!

Does anyone know the rancher joke about the idiot, the bottle of whisky, and the ranchhands pay?

It was a good one too...

Aaron



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dieselpaul

04-18-2008 07:46:15




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 Re: AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES in reply to dave2, 04-18-2008 03:57:02  
Ha--thats good dave2--i've been workin' on my bush-hog with a hammer without any luck--i will now ck for electrical problems--have a good day--paul



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dave2

04-18-2008 04:29:36




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 Re: AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES in reply to dave2, 04-18-2008 03:57:02  
I work on the 3rd floor and deal with plenty of people that make the slinky one look real good..... ..... .....



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highlandcowman

04-18-2008 04:20:45




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 Re: AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES in reply to dave2, 04-18-2008 03:57:02  
dave, they are are words to live by,a very wise man you are..thanks for the smile this morning doug



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