Posted by Bob Huntress on December 24, 2011 at 15:55:06 from (74.226.90.170):
You know who you are. My children are teenagers, and if there exist a "Nice" list with either of them on it, it was probably written in Iranian. I'll be going to sleep with a large rifle near by. My roof isn't strong enough for that much weight, and every year you get fatter and fatter. Have you considered SlimFast, Fatso? If I hear any noise on my roof, tomorrow's dinner will include reindeere steaks. The tempeture isn't that cold here, so when you see smoke coming from my chimney, take a hint. You will notice that the last sleigh you lost on my roof is now a chicken coop in the back yard. Nothing personal, but everytime you stuff your size 75 waste into my chimney, you eat everything in my fridge, and leave some Dollar Tree keychain. I suspect that your reindeer are probably carring some NorthPole Anthrax, and I would appreciate that trampy Donner staying away from my billy goat with her foriegn viruses. If she is that loose with my billy goat, she has likely been loose with every other billy goat, if you know what I'm saying. Why do you insist on bothering us? Three years ago, when I shot your rearend with rock salt as you were knocking over the wise men in my Nativity scene? That hay was for the manger, not your glow in the dark freakshow Rudualf! Stay away, is that so much to ask?
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Today's Featured Article - Listening to Your Tractor - by Curtis Von Fange. Years ago there was a TV show about a talking car. Unless you are from another planet, physically or otherwise, I don’t think our internal combustion buddies will talk and tell us their problems. But, on the other hand, there is a secret language that our mechanical companions readily do speak. It is an interesting form of communication that involves all the senses of the listener. In this series we are going to investigate and learn the basic rudimentary skills of understanding this lingo.
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