Re: O/T: What do you think?

Posted by Billy NY on February 10, 2012 at 08:23:00 from (67.248.100.3):

In Reply to: O/T: What do you think? posted by farmallman on February 09, 2012 at 23:11:29:

Its hard to figure, need accurate accounts of both sides, history of the situation etc., teens need to realize that a little respect for your "tribal elders" goes a long way, parents need to negotiate the curves that kids throw at them very carefully. Once a kid knows responsibility, understands hard work and monetary benefits of same, has respect for others, especially their elders, for clothing, housing and providing food, they might have half a chance, when they don't its a serious problem, that's when the typical blame game commences. I agree it starts at a young age and things are so much different now.

I can understand the frustration of the father, but in reality, its "one upmanship" (if there is such a word LOL !) I'll show you kid, you're gonna learn now boy, put couple of caps in yer laptop and put you on "double secret probation", eternal grounding like a copper clad ground rod. The kid is going to hate him for destroying that lap top.

My father would pull that crap and still does around the farm with problem help, it does not work, next thing you know that "I'll show you" escalates and there a gun involved, darned kid is now hateful and wants revenge. What does it accomplish. You get me, I get you, repeat ......

I can understand dads frustration and disappointment with a kid that would be so disrespectful, you can't let that get you angry or angry enough to be stupid. Oh, and I'd have a hard time not doing what he did, apple don't fall far from the tree, however, if were me, maybe I'd make the video, address that paragraph the daughter wrote, and done just what he did, 'cept the laptop would have been another that looks the same, worn out, broke, real one off limits for awhile or longer, be a dad and get to the bottom of it so years later, you'll laugh about it, instead of having a daughter whom hates you. Kid still needs to respect her dad, and do what is asked of her, dad needs to be more articulate and not give up, too easy to just haul off and do what he did and it still accomplishes nothing, turns into a stand off. Thing is, parent is supposed to be smarter than the kids, not always the case, but should be, and when you have a problem that's when you need to be smart about it or just outsmart the kid, while trying to be a good parent and work it out, teaching them something that will help vs adding to the problem.

The thing I hate is you have one chance at being a good parent, don't blow it, or do things you will regret, the problem I have with what he did, was their personal information, photos and keepsake things that are now lost, I'd be damned heartbroke if someone intentionally did that to my PC and I lost priceless photos, of family, friends or things like that, thats a rotten thing to do to solve a behavioral problem, kinda like slicing someones tires or keying their car, when you should face the person. Hope they work it out, hate seeing parents/kids relationships gone awry, happens way too much.

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