Posted by jhilyer on January 21, 2013 at 06:42:20 from (74.81.112.46):
In Reply to: OT Youngest son posted by dej(jed) on January 21, 2013 at 04:55:24:
My middle son, a teenager, is doing the same to me. I give and give, he takes more. And no respect. In fact, I think he holds me in contempt. Throw an ex-wife in the mix who is constantly up his azz telling him how great he is, and you get the picture. My youngest son is only slightly better.
Like others have pointed out, it's your fault, and it's my fault. Some kids do well with me mutual respect thing, some don't, and only take, take, take, like your son and my son.
Just this weekend my new wife, a wonderful woman, had a sit down with my boys. The gist was 'quit being a-holes'. And then she gave them a lesson on where heart attacks come from, and made it clear that if things didn't change, she'd probably be a widow within the next couple of years. And she wan't going to let that happen!
That got their attention (and mine, too!), well, at least the younger one seemed concerned. The older one is very jealous of my new wife. It's clear now that he's pushing me to make a choice. He's going to be suprised when the choice isn't him.
I understand now that at a certain point, you have to say: See ya! Have a nice life. When you get yourself straightened around, come on back.
It's hard for a parent - we raise the child, we put everything into the child, we hope the child turns out well. And maybe your son and my boys will get their heads out from you-know-where someday.
I vote cut him off and let him fend for himself. I've tried that warm fuzzy 'I love you' crap, it doesn't work, only makes it worse.
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