I can relate to your position, and his. A person has to come to terms with the fact that you only have so many "hours" in ya. Same is true when you know you have to press onward, digging deep and mustering what it takes to get where you are headed. Life is a book, and you go from chapter to chapter, some of which bring closure on things, which can be extremely difficult to accept, but you must, we all have to at some point. Knowing that, gives you justification, to find closure and move on, be it into your declining years. Its not an easy decision to make, I too would want to find a way, figure it out, but the toughest of us will be humbled just the same.
Our long time friend, neighbor and farmer, a long time dairyman, a farmers farmer, and it just does not run any deeper than it does in this man. He's overcome having his place burnt to the ground, I believe twice, I saw the last one. His health retired him, not his mind. I went to visit with him not too long ago, and I realize that with what he is dealing with, will eventually get him, being an overwhelming condition, however he's toughed it out, and just keeps persisting, though he's going through h$ll at times, which I have seen while visiting with him when hospitalized. I don't know how he musters the courage to accept that this chapter is closed, when speaking with him, there are times you can tell how hard it is on him, to know this. I admire one thing about him, he always looks at tomorrow being a better day, and often says, "I have my good days and my bad days"
His condition is not cancer, its his liver, and related problems, not from excessive alcohol or anything of the sort, related to diabetes, which he's looked after medically for years or since he knew.
It was hard to sit across the kitchen table from him, as I had done so many times before, I spent most of one year working with him, many times after a hard day, come on in, have dinner ! They always feed you, his wife would always bring something to the field every time we worked. It was a good year, I had helped him with hay for years, bought hay, hired him to haul bedding, even put up my own hay with his equipment, well filled my order for the best 2nd cut I could buy. Then, going all the way back to the beginning, just a lot of history, working this land, he'd get stuck, my father would fire up the D7 pull him out, years later I get stuck, he'd come right over. Remember one year, got stuck with the mower conditioner on, + some other problem, just had no time to get this field cut and baled, he came over and did it, always there if you needed him. Its hard to imagine as time passes that things change, you want them to remain the same, but they never do.
I look at the one field he still planted here, nothing but weeds, which I now cut every year. Its hard to imagine not seeing that tractor roll in every spring, like it has since before I was born, to plant crops, same with harvest. I plant part of it now, just forage for deer.
In '09, his shed was full of equipment, much of it is gone, though his sons will continue with hay, all of the rented ground on our side is gone to the large operator, as well as another farm he rented most of. One thing I miss, is seeing the equipment rolling down his road and over to this side, no need to anymore. A peak high of land, equipment and crops to plant and harvest, to the downsizing that had to take place. I think he had 60 years in farming, I always enjoy seeing the photo on the wall of a young man, a full head of hair, a JD 420 and JD tow behind combine, he started out doing his and custom work, also worked at a feed store, a large stable, drove school bus, and still worked with his dad on their farm. A guy like him defines the word work, what a farmer is, and many similar things.
At some point be it earlier in life or towards the end, you have to look back, have no regrets, and move on. Its tough to see a strong hard working person become disabled and have to hang it up, he did well in life, hard to understand why he's been burdened with debilitating health, but it will happen to all of us.
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Today's Featured Article - A Cautionary Tale - by Ian Minshull. In the early 1950s my father bought an Allis Chalmers B and I used it for all the row crop work with the mangolds and potatoes, rolling and the haymaking on our farm. The farm and the Allis were sold and I have spent a lifetime working on farms throughout the country. I promised myself that one day I would own an Allis. That time event
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