I don't think there's a person over the age of 18 on this planet who hasn't thought about killing himself at some point, at least in the abstract sense. The ability to end our own lives sets humans apart from most other species.
In my opinion, we each have the right to decide whether we want to go on living or not. But we do NOT have the right to cause pain to those who care about us. Please think about how your death will affect those around you. Whatever your problems are, I know someone has gone through much worse difficulties and survived.
It sounds like you are very depressed. I hope you will seek help. You are not the first person to have suicidal thoughts, and depression is common even among folks whom you would think have no problems. As for the afterlife, I wouldn't count on it being any better than what you have here on earth. Make the best of what you have. Your life does matter, and you can't help those who depend on you if you're not here.
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Today's Featured Article - Earthmaster Project Progress Just a little update on my Earthmaster......it's back from the dead! I pulled the head, and soaked the stuck valves with mystery oil overnight, re-installed the head, and bingo, the compression returned. But alas, my carb foiled me again, it would fire a second then flood out. After numerous dead ends for a replacement carb, I went to work fixing mine.I soldered new floats on the float arm, they came from an old motorcycle carb, replaced the packing on the throttle shaft with o-rings, cut new ga
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