Posted by Dave H (MI) on October 13, 2014 at 12:42:28 from (50.108.99.9):
In Reply to: O/TFamily Dilema Advice posted by fergienewbee on October 13, 2014 at 09:44:09:
I have a deadbeat sister and BIL. If you don't send them money you cease to exist in their eyes. Won't give you the time of day. I stopped existing about 12 years ago. They have even moved and I have not been given a forwarding address. There was never a harsh word, just an end to the money. This is where it eventually ends up when all the enablers keep providing money. You as a good person, with their best interests at heart, can actually end up the outsider while the family rallies around the deadbeat.
Don't send money. Don't pay his bills. Don't try to get him help. Let him sort it out for himself. There is always the possibility that, if you refuse him, he might just pull it together and actually live out his life with some self respect. But don't get your hopes up.
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