I'll second that a trust should have been done long ago... 'Course that doesn't matter now.
I'm in the same situation essentially. I just managed to get it in a trust a little over a year ago, and I'm getting both parents in a care facility in the next week, or two. (prior to forcing the trust issue, the genius hadn't bothered to update the wills since 1969, which is before my sister, and I were born... Just dumb)
Care in NJ, is well over $10k per month, per person. They're going to a place out in PA, so the numbers drop by half, but it's still a whole lot of money. Now I get to try to ride out 4 more years before they would qualify for Medicaid, in the hope that I can save the farm. It should be ok with their other assets getting liquidated, but that didn't need to happen if they had just been more realistic. (the Alzheimer's diagnosis was 4 years ago, and the other's cancer was 3 years ago)
Ignoring the reality of aging, and or illness doesn't help anyone. Nobody wants to grow old, or need medical care, but dealing with it honestly, and early would make most people's lives much simpler in the end...
Let me add (as I edit) that I'm obviously no expert, going through this just now... What I will suggest is finding an estate planner to help you. You may get some ideas here, or elsewhere online, but there are fine differences in the trust process between states. There are lots of different kinds of trusts as well, and you may even find that a trust isn't the ideal in your situation. The important thing is to get some help from someone that does this for a living, and can look at it objectively. It sounds like you have thought it through somewhat, but you need to make sure that you're all on the same page so it gets done right. It is going to come down to your uncle in the end though. In my case, I did the best I could to plan it out, and then at the last moment, my father spoke to the lawyer to make changes without involving me. His changes are going to make some real challenges for me in terms of taking care of them. It's just my sister and I so it'll work as long as she's on board, but there's too much room for things to go south as they frequently do with families, money, and property...
This post was edited by Tslinger on 11/02/2021 at 09:10 am.
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