No, I am really not being unkind...just forthright, upfront....and honest.
If folks would prearrange their final wishes, many costs can be kept down.
But, they wait until somebody croaks and then show up on the funeral home doorstep crying....Mommy just died...somebody go get her and.....boo-hoo, make her look good! Sometimes that is a big order...but it generally gets filled to the letter. Most "only want the best for dear old dad". Mainly because they don"t want to appear cheap while sending the dearly departed off. But when it comes time to settle up, they just about schitt on the spot. "Nobody told me the newspaper charges "per word" when I wrote that flowery 3 column obit detailing all of daddy"s accomplishments as a prize hog farmer and his FFA awards in the class of "36!" Well Clotine....they do....that"ll be $687. "Nobody said the limo was extra.....and we didn"t want mommy to have to follow the hearse in our cattle truck!" You should have asked RayGene, or else went to Budget and rented a clean Chevette for the funeral. The list goes on and on.....bottom line is, people expect the works to soothe their grief and then suffer the bleeding schitts when they get the bill and then cry, Foul!
Maybe people would like it if the body got crammed in a cardboard box, hauled to the cemetery in the bed of a pickup and a cross made from a 2x4 jabbed in the dirt over the grave. That"d be cheap....and that seems to be what this thread was all about....wanting and expecting premium services....for a cut rate price.
You get what you pay for...if you want less, just tell the funeral home to cremate the remains and scatter them on Potter"s Field. You should get that for around $800.
When grandma sits down and has that heart to heart talk about her final wishes...how she wants a knotty pine casket and a silk shroud with her initials embroidered across the front and full floral spread on the coffin and of course...the finest vault money can buy and for Brother Thurlow Longwind to present the eulogy down at the 1st Baptist Church, with the choir singing the 8 songs she has selected and 2 nights of viewing so everybody can come see her off.......tell her that ain"t happening! tell her, your butt is going to the furnace in a cardboard box and we"re spending that money on hog panels and fuel injector parts! That isn"t happening either....and we both know it.
It costs a lot of money to run a funeral home and their services aren"t cheap......don"t expect them to be. Some States permit you to dispose of the body yourselves. If it isn"t embalmed....you generally have 24 hours. Get a death certificate, take the old case backhoe...or a shovel, and dig hole. Roll the corpse in.....no need in making a box.....lumber costs too much to just bury....kick the dirt in and walk away. I promise the dead will never know the difference....only you will.
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